Friday, October 28, 2005

By my side (55 word poem)

You with me,

A child
picking up pebbles,

hunting four leaf clovers,
running along primrose paths,
licking lemons sitting on doorsteps,

You with me,


A youth
in a restaurant full of people,

gazing into my eyes as I gazed back
at life aromatic with pain and strife,

Loneliness so faithful,

You’re always by my side......


(The 55-word poem idea is English-August's
the link to which is posted in the title)

14 Comments:

At 10:03 AM, Blogger transience said...

i love your use of everyday scenery here, pincushion! makes the poem pretty and grounded.

 
At 2:24 PM, Blogger . : A : . said...

Lovely imagery and moments in this one. Have added it to the list.

Do you want to add the tag - 55 word poem

 
At 9:19 PM, Blogger Cocaine Jesus said...

I feel like a snooker ball that is boucing around and off the 55 cushion of blogging fashion.

clever stuff Pins.

 
At 7:17 AM, Blogger arvindiyer said...

And wat do u know...this Girl can WRITE TOO:)

 
At 12:04 PM, Blogger Paperslut said...

Nice.

Reminds me of Marcy Playground's first album. Do listen if you can get your hands on it.

 
At 4:31 PM, Blogger mermaid said...

You know what I love about this 55 word poem? Though you meet the 55 word criterion, you shape the verses with your own form.

 
At 7:13 PM, Blogger Rama The Drama said...

"hunting four leaf clovers,
running along primrose paths,"

such flow doesn't come so easily!The restriction of words does seem to force you to come up with something unique!

 
At 4:47 PM, Blogger Pincushion said...

Trans-Thanks! but could have been better for sure!

Agastya-Thanks! Yep, did add the tag :)

CJ-Clever? donno really! but had go anyways, lol!

Arvind-I am glad to find out you think so ;)!!

Mermaid-Ahh, I tried! But i'm afraid am not too happy with it! Thanks for the words of encouragement!

Ramchi-You are always so generous with your kind words! Thank you :)

 
At 4:48 PM, Blogger Pincushion said...

Wonderwall-I sure will make it a point! Thanks :)

 
At 6:47 AM, Blogger Jyotsna said...

This is simple yet so beautiful!

 
At 11:00 PM, Blogger Lorena said...

i like the observations here. very warm and tender and honest.

very sweet poem.

 
At 7:58 PM, Blogger camera shy said...

55 words

this is cool

i will give it whirl mysef soon . . .

 
At 11:44 PM, Blogger Russell Ragsdale said...

Poingnat twist, beautifly done Pins! I liked his a lot, the theme is fantastic too!

 
At 8:30 PM, Blogger iamnasra said...

uThis week Living In Poetry is having a tribute for .:A:. (English-August Blogspot) please visit the blog down below to tell us your thoughts on his writing and poetry


L I P
www.livinginpoetry.blogspot.com

Spread the word

 

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