Her soliloquy:

Shredded bits of paper with torn stories, thy name is life.

The one bedrock of my certainty proved to be a waxy candle, burnt down. What do I hold on to now? My dreams wail a betrayal that I cannot articulate. But I have no one to blame but myself! Me the architect of morbid messes.

Transparency eludes me at this point and life is just another name for opaqueness. Sentences in the past tense, float in the breeze along with your name. If I could delineate every word into letters of wanting, perhaps it would all fall apart whilst trying to come together?

I spin tales of solitude and soliloquies abound at this moment. Music is a duet of solace and distress. All I need now is to dance this dance and when I come crashing down, I know there won't be any arms.

But I shall go on.

Timeless...

...its amazing how love can transcend time, distance, age and sometimes even gender...

i wait for the ocean wave
to whisper your message
washed up on the shore
buried deep in the sand
for centuries
unknown

Brokeback Mountain said it all..it doesn't matter whether love happens to be between two people of the same-sex; in its truest sense it is between two hearts, which feel and care and hurt. It can happen at the most unexpected times in life, in the most unexpected of places and in the most unexpected of ways, and survive against all odds.

i listen to
the song
of raindrops
on window panes
pining and painful strains of
melodies lost

What is love, after all ?!! I suspect it means different things to different people but the fact remains that it is powerful and painful. Break it down to its chemicals, analyse it all you want but I doubt we will ever understand it or be cured of it but sometimes I almost wish we could be!

days, months, years
what are they!
in an eternity
of life-times
spent
waiting,wanting, waiting......

AD. 

Wine & cigarettes!

I drink you

in

With every sip

Alas

you aren’t

Here

To see

how I bleed

you

in my

blood stream
-------------------------

You spiral me away

With every puff

All that remains

Of me
now

Is the stub

That you grind

Under your heel

--------------------------

Frozen sparkling tears

Drying on silken webs

Of lashes….

Scattered reflections

Of shattered loving

In flashes…

Murmured whispers

Trailing on lips

Now silenced.

Now bring on
the
wine and cigarettes
killing off
bits
of
myself

------------X-----------

Why?

I sit tapping in front of this silver screen, marvelling at its magic that transcends distances and time and connects hearts and minds flung across the blue marble. I imagine blue sparks coursing through space like a living form and me running along side them. I met you and you and you all becoming an inseparable part of my life through these sparkling lights and it all began on this silver screen....
As the words jump out, and fingers flutter tap-tapping across the little playground, I'm transported into distant lands and lives, suddenly no longer alone and yet.....

With so much to bind us together, the world fabricates even more reasons to divide us all..
why? why? why?

...at this moment a dear friend, who is also a soldier is part of UN peace-keeping force in Africa.

I pray for peace....
for each and every one of us and this world.

DO these words sound cliched and hackneyed?

Perhaps its the sign of our times that they do so. All of us living in our little cucooned, insulated worlds and lives, so busy running around in circles, that we have no time for anything else. A consumerist world, where money is success and idealism is unfashionable. I had hoped that time would inure me, anaesthesize me into an unfeeling, unblinking coma of apathetic indifference but it hasn't! Is that a good or bad thing? I don't know.

And thats why I shall always be the Pincushion, feeling a million pinpricks.